Here are the reasons I believe the last thing you need is couples therapy to correct a Domestic Violence behavior: I believe in autonomy and believe also that everyone is responsible for their own change. For the purpose of this post, I categorize DV as a “True Batterer and Impulse Control Batterer.”
The true batterer, as defined but the State is someone who imposes their will on to another by means of physical, sexual, psychological, and emotional tactics. This is the person (male or female) who has a deep seated belief that it is okay to use abusive behavior to control others. This type person will most likely not benefit from treatment (re-education). This is not to say they will not change because surely, some do and it’s usually later in life when that change comes about…How much damage have they done in the process of their change? This type batterer is not suited for couples therapy because he/she will use the therapy session to gather intelligence and ammunition to use against their victim and so, it becomes a safety issue. Most professional subscribe to that idea.
The impulse control batterer is most likely a person who doesn’t cope well with change or has some carry-over issues from adolescence that manifests in adulthood. This person throws things out of frustration and the inability to reach a compromise in conflict resolution; there is no middle ground for the person who lacks the necessary coping skill that should have been learned early in life. Some would argue that this is still domestic violence and I would agree with that with the exception of a true batterer does not have to be angry to be abusive and this person is someone who is reactive to situations due to lack of skills.
