by Mike Willbur | PTSD, Uncategorized
Treatment for PTSD will depend on the needs and desires of the person seeking treatment. Some of the most common modalities for treatment of PTSD are listed below:
Behavioral or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
This approach looks at ways in which a person thinks about a problem, learned to certain triggers associated with that problem and ways in which thinking affects the emotional state. This treatment often uses a combination of exposure (deliberately thinking about an event or confronting a trigger) and relaxation training along with cognitive restructuring or changing thoughts or beliefs about that event or trigger. This process tends to desensitize a person’s response to reminders of the event so that it no longer carries the same emotional impact. This can be a very effective treatment.
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
This modality uses exposure to the traumatic memory paired with “bilateral stimulation” of the brain by tracking the therapist’s finger or string of lights with the eyes or listening to alternating tones. Current thoughts, feelings, physical sensations and beliefs are activated and the tracking helps to reduce emotional and physiological reaction to the memory. This desensitization helps to process negative beliefs about themselves to adaptive, healthy and more accurate beliefs. There have been numerous studies over the years on EMDR and has shown to be a rapid and effective treatment for PTSD.
Group Therapy
Group therapy can be helpful following a traumatic event as it provides a safe and supportive environment in which to discuss a shared experience with others. There is often a felt sense that nobody understands and a group can help a person to feel less alienated, normalizing reactions to an abnormal event.
Medication
Medication is an option but many avoid this as they may feel stigmatized for doing so. Traumatic events can influence the neurochemistry of the body and brain, impacting the person in many ways. Excessive stress hormones can make it difficult to concentrate, relax or even sleep. They can increase blood pressure, muscle tension, skin conductance and general arousal levels. Traumatic events can also impair immune system functioning, making people more vulnerable to illness. Medication can be an effective way to reset these levels in the brain and may prove to be very helpful for a period.
by mwdrutledge59 | Uncategorized
PTSD is not the only issue a Veteran may be left with after serving our country. There are a multitude of presenting problems that may loom unexpectedly after discharge from the regimented system a veteran is accustomed to in the military.
There a veteran does most everything collectively. This makes decision making a very unique process, especially when you have been immersed for a number of years in the military way of life.
Sometimes after traumatic experiences, the memories of those experiences become lost in the depths of the limbic part of the brain. As a result, veterans may have found themselves making many decisions based on emotion and not on an intellectual basis.
That is treatable, and with the help of a therapist, I have seen many Veterans overcome the many obstacles they are faced with after discharge from the military.
by Mike Willbur | Anger Management, Domestic Violence, Familicide, Uncategorized
Are you afraid to say you are the head of your household? Do you and your spouse have agreed upon roles for the sake of organizing your family in order to raise the children in an organized, thoughtful, and forward thinking way of life? Or is your home in chaos?
If man has been socialized to think he is the controller but misunderstands the role, shouldn’t that thinking be explored? Is there really a problem with being assigned the role of head of household? Does it have to be either a man or a woman? What difference does it really make as long as there is integrity, continuity, and love in the home (love is not always a comfortable experience by the way).
Here is a thought to ponder – if you’re such a great leader in the work place, should you understand how to convert that leadership style into something more fitting for the family?
by Mike Willbur | Anger Management, Domestic Violence, Familicide, Uncategorized
My name is Sarah, I am but three, my eyes are swollen, I cannot see.
I must be stupid – I must be bad – What else could have made my Daddy so mad?
I wish I were better – I wish I weren’t ugly – Then maybe my mummy would still want to hug me
I can’t speak at all – I can’t do a wrong – Or else I’m locked up all day long
When I awake, I’m all alone – The house is dark – My parents aren’t home
When mummy does come, I’ll try to be nice – Then maybe I’ll just get – One whipping tonight
Don’t make a sound, I just heard a car – my daddy is back – From Charlie’s bar
I hear him curse – my name he calls – I press myself against the wall
I try to hide from his evil eyes – I’m so afraid now – I’m starting to cry
He finds me weeping – He shouts ugly words – He says it’s my fault that he suffers at work
He slaps me and hits me, and yells at me more – I finally get free, And run for the door
He’s already locked it and I start to bawl – He takes me and throws me – against the hard wall
I fall to the floor – with my bones badly broken – And my daddy continues – with more bad words spoken
“I’m sorry!” I scream – but its now much too late – His face has been twisted into unimaginable hate
The hurt and the pain – Again and again – oh please God have mercy – Oh please let it end
And he finally stops – and heads for the door – while I lay there motionless, Sprawled on the floor
My name is Sarah – I am but three – Tonight my daddy murdered me
by Mike Willbur | Anger Management, Domestic Violence, Uncategorized
Even when a person decides to change, it’s not like flipping the light switch off. The behavior continues without practicing alternative ways of conflict resolution. This is assuming the Abuser is not showing any sociopathic tendencies, in which case, no reason is needed for abuse. When a person decides to change, that first step is the most powerful of all changes.
The next step is to discover why the behavior was there in the first place – an exploration of belief systems to discover if there are any flaws in that area. Ask yourself, “How did I come to believe it’s okay to manipulate and use other controlling behaviors in order to maintain a comfort zone?”
If possible, after you have taken responsibility for your own abusive behaviors, explore your relationship and share with your partner how you are changing and trying to change (in time, you’ll not need to tell your partner as they will see the change). Learn to take criticism constructively and to invest into your emotional bank account by complimenting not only your intimate partner but everyone in your household. This investment cost no money and have a tremendous return ratio – guaranteed!
by Mike Willbur | Anger Management, Domestic Violence, Familicide, Uncategorized
I was raised by a father who was born in 1919 and a mother of the same era. They lived through the depression and family roles were very clear cut in those days (as I was taught by my father). My father was the care taker of the family matters and from all appearances, the final say about any disputes that presented. He, although a compassionate and fair man and certainly respected by the community, had all the power – he had the ultimate control over the family. Now, it wasn’t a malignant power; it was just how it was and society defined the roles of the men and women back then just as it is done now.
As the rules changed in regards to male and female roles, it was not met without resistance. You see, the power we had as men and caretakers of our family had been diminished by society and rightly so. Far too many abused their power over their partners and even those who were not responsible roles models for their families, continued to use and of course, abuse the assumed power over the family.
Here’s what I think happens when the control and power is questioned: It is thought to be an innate power and when it is questioned and the, let’s say, head of the household has problems with communication skills or has a fear of losing control, then anxiety becomes a component of the family dynamic and that just doesn’t mix well. This post is addressed to only the males – our society and the rules are ever so changing and we should embrace the differences between men and women and further, explore how to lose the fear of someone else sharing the load or in short, being in control. How do we define what a man is? That is the real question. As a man, what is more important? Love or Respect? I would ask the same question of any female readers. This is just a perspective and I write this knowing there are many more…
